How to Be More Interesting in 11 Simple Steps

Most people have a secret wish to be more interesting. How do I know?

Google told me. This morning I logged on to do my monthly check of our website analytics. As I settled in with my coffee to peruse our latest numbers, search hits and demographics, I stumbled upon an interesting little finding.

While scrolling through our top search terms (what people search to get to the Science of People website) I found this phrase was at the top of the list:

“How to Be Interesting”

This intrigued me. Why? Because it is not a word I often hear people use. I hear people say:

• I want to be more memorable
• I want to be more charismatic
• I want to be more impressive
• I want to be more powerful
• I want to be more attractive
• I want to be more successful

But, I almost never hear “I want to be more interesting”—at least not in person. Interesting it seems is a secret wish, a secret we tell only to search engines. Well, worry no more!

Here’s the good news:

You are interesting.

I know you have incredible things about you. Secret wishes. Fascinating ideas.

We just have to activate them. But there is one problem:

The biggest barrier to being more interesting is fear.

Fear causes us to doubt our interestingness. In fear mode we:

• Worry about people judging our ideas
• Doubt ourselves
• Are afraid of what people will think of us

So we hide what’s interesting about us. We keep our ideas inside. We don’t share our true selves. Bottom line:

Your fear of being uninteresting makes you uninteresting.

Fear shuts us down. It not only shuts down our desire to share interesting things, it also shuts down our desire to do interesting things.

your fear prevents you from trying interesting things, talking about interesting topics and engaging with interesting people because being interesting means trying to do things, talk about things and think about things that stand out. And as social animals, it can be scary to stand out.

But guess what? You are in direct control of how interesting a person you are. Interestingness and laziness are inversely proportional. I call this the lazy law

The Lazy Law

The lazier you are, the less interesting you will be.

The more proactive you are, the more interesting you will be.

Have you ever met a lazy talker? They don’t take ownership of their ideas or the conversation. Here’s what it’s like talking to an uninteresting person:

Uninteresting people are lazy.

• They don’t do interesting things.
• They don’t think interesting thoughts.
• They expect you to do all the talking.
• They want to be entertained by the people around them.

But it doesn’t have to be this way! All you have to do is:

FIGHT THE LAZY!

Here’s how you can fight the lazy and bring on the interesting.

Here’s how you can be a more interesting person in 5 steps:

Step #1 Stop Doing Uninteresting Things

Oh wow, you watch Netflix? Do you watch it on your iPad or computer? NO! This is not interesting. If you come home every day after work and watch the same shows everyone else is watching and do the lowest common denominator of activities, then you have no chance of being interesting.

Here’s what lazy people do:

• They watch TV every day
• They eat at the same restaurants over and over again
• They go to the same vacation spot every year
• They only read the books that were assigned in high school
• They spend hours checking their social media feeds
• They talk about the weather
• They expect other people to do all the talking

These are all default topics. Don’t stick with the default settings. Don’t do what everyone else is doing. Don’t watch what everyone else is watching.

If you want to be a more interesting person, you have to do interesting things.

Here’s how you can level up your life and dial down your laziness:

• Try a new restaurant you have driven by a million times but never tried
• Create a bucket list and pledge to do one activity every month
• Go to the movie theater and watch a movie that you would never normally choose
• Sign up for a workout class that you have never done before
• Pick up a magazine you would never normally read and explore it cover to cover
• Start a learning bucket list and learn one new skill
• Say yes to the next 5 requests—-no matter what they are

Step #2 Stop Asking About Uninteresting Things

Being interesting is about doing interesting things, but the flip side is being interested in other people’s interesting things.

You become interesting when you are interested in other people’s interestingness.

Lazy people bring out the uninteresting side in other people. They:

• Ask boring questions like ‘What do you do?’
• Ask ‘How are you?’ and don’t really mean it
• Talk about the weather
• Ask what TV shows people are watching

Why even bother with these questions? What’s the point of asking boring questions? You don’t learn anything and you make the person you are with even less interesting.

Here’s how you can level up your life and be more interesting with every person you meet:

• Ask someone about the weirdest thing they have ever eaten.
• Ask someone what’s on their bucket list and if you can help them accomplish any of it.
• Ask someone about the movie that most changed their life.
• Ask someone about a new skill they are learning.
• Ask someone about their personal passion project.
• Ask someone what their New Year’s Resolutions were and if they accomplished them.

Break auto-pilot and social scripts with your questions—-you will be rewarded with great answers.

Step #3 Consume Interesting Things

We consume all day long. We consume food and drink, we consume media, we consume information.

What you consume makes up who you are.

Lazy people are uninteresting because they consume uninteresting things:

• They read news from the default browser homepage
• They get updates from friends on their social media feeds instead of actually talking to them.
• They eat fake food from vending machines or freezers.
• They consume media and don’t question the source.
• They read from sources that already confirm their beliefs.
• They only watch blockbuster movies.
• They only read bestsellers.

Yes, it’s easier to stick with the default. It’s easier to eat what’s given to you. It’s easier to read and watch what everyone else is reading and watching.

But who said easy was fun? It certainly isn’t interesting.

Try this:

• Ask your local librarian for his or her 5 favorite books of all time and read them.
• Ask your role model for a movie that changed his or her life and go watch it.
• Read a news source that is known for being the opposite of your political views and see what you learn.
• Find a new favorite news columnist.
• Read books that stimulate fascinating conversations.

Step #4 Ask People About the Interesting Things They Are Consuming

It’s hard to network, make memorable conversations and build connections. But you can do it! You just have to fight to be interesting by breaking out of autopilot.

One of the easiest ways to stimulate interesting conversation is to ask people about:

• What they think
• How they think
• What intrigues them
• What they are learning
• How they learn
• Weird things they have seen/eaten/done/heard
• Surprising things they have seen/eaten/done/heard

Decide to become an interesting detective.

Decide that you are going to uncover every interesting tidbit about every person you meet.

If you expect people to be interesting, they often rise to your expectations.

Here’s a little mental trick I use…I assume that every person I meet has a secret back story and I have to write an article about them tomorrow. First, it informs my questions to be more specific. Second, I assume they are already interesting—I just need to uncover what it is.

And if you’re further interested in leveling up your charm, check out this goodie:

Step #5 Hang Out with Interesting People

The final step to being interesting is to find interesting people to hang out with. Typically, interesting people hang out together—and now that’s you!

Interesting people encourage the people around them to do interesting things, talk about interesting topics, and engage with interesting ideas.

Let’s quickly take stock:

Who is the most interesting person you know?_______________________

Who is the funniest person you know?_______________________

Who is the most well-read person you know?_______________________

Who is the most well-traveled person you know?_______________________

Who is the strangest person you know?______________________

Thought of someone for each prompt? Good! Now go hang out with them. They are your interesting tribe.

Had trouble answering those prompts? Then you need to build your tribe.

Learn how to make friends as an adult (non-awkwardly).

Step #6 Have Your Signature Quirk

Your “signature quirk” is basically anything you say or do consistently that makes you unique. A charming quirk that sets you apart and leaves a lasting impact.

Here’s the secret sauce: Your signature quirk can be anything—-a witty catchphrase, a quirky fashion statement, or even a unique hobby. It’s the little detail that people associate with you.

Remember James Bond and his perfectly shaken martinis? You remembered, right? That’s it!

But worry not! Having your own signature quirk doesn’t have to be a Hollywood-level production. 

You just have to be consistent and authentic by being yourself. You can try these quirky things:

• Your signature greeting: Greet others with a mysterious wink, a playful salute, a secret handshake that leaves them intrigued and eager to connect further, or a spontaneous high-five followed by a goofy dance move, sparking instant laughter—but remember to do this appropriately.
• Your signature toast: Ever give a toast? Don’t be boring! You can steal the “To drinking like pirates and laughing like Minions!” inspired by Pirates of the Caribbean and Despicable Me, or you can try these:

• “Here’s to nights so epic, even our smartphones can’t keep up!”
• “To the friends who know all our secrets but love us anyway—bottoms up!”
• “May our cocktails be strong and our hangovers be short!”
• “Here’s to surviving another week—-let’s drink to that!”

• Your signature food(s): Don’t be shy about sharing your preferred ANYTHING (food is a good one to start with), whether it’s a bold Patron-Red Bull mix, eating burritos with ketchup, or having the midnight munchies… several times per week.
• Your signature excuse: Need a witty comeback? Give this a shot: “It happens to the worst of us….”, it is a playful spin on “It happens to the best of us.”. Imagine forgetting someone’s name mid-conversation—-just shrug it off with a casual, “Oh well, it happens to the worst of us…”
• Your signature movie line: Channeling your inner Russell Crowe, you often pull out the memorable line from Gladiator: “Are you not entertained?” But you don’t need to memorize a movie line, either. Try one of these awesome work jokes the next time you want to make things interesting: 294 Funniest Work Jokes For The Work of The Day (Ultimate List)

Step #7 Take Up An Interesting Hobby

Break free from the same old routine and take a look into some exciting hobbies because let’s be honest, being interesting is not just about what you do for work.

Being interesting is about the passions and pursuits that you enjoy.

Keyword here: Enjoy! So if you don’t enjoy something, don’t force yourself. Here are some of my faves:

• Shake it up: Try dancing—-whether it’s the swing, salsa, or even breakdancing. Let loose and groove to the rhythm! Attend local dance classes or join online communities to refine your moves and meet like-minded enthusiasts.
• Martial Arts Mastery: From the fluid grace of karate to the fierce intensity of Jiu-jitsu, find your fighting style and embrace the journey of self-mastery. Start with beginner classes and gradually challenge yourself to advance through the ranks.
• Abracadabra: Some people love magic tricks, and that can make you more interesting for them. Learn magic tricks to dazzle friends, family, or even your boss!

Want tutorials? You can watch this for starters: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pv6HMbEav1w

• Reach new heights: Wanna conquer your fear? Feel the rush of adrenaline as you scale breathtaking cliffs and push your limits. You can start with indoor climbing gyms.

Remember: Balance your hobbies with work and rest for a fulfilling lifestyle, no pressure to do hobbies just because the “cool kids” do them. Remember these 4 words:

• Mix: Try to aim for a variety of hobbies. I like to pick one for relaxation (meditation or going for walks), one for physical activities (hiking or sports), one for mental (reading or writing), and one job-related (like learning a new professional skill).
• Stir: Try to integrate these hobbies throughout your day or week, giving time to get better at these hobbies.
• Rest: We want to avoid burnout (remember the story of the turtle and the hare?), so give yourself grace and relax when you need it.
• Repeat: Consistency is key! Even spending just 10 minutes a day on a hobby can get you far in the long run.

Step #8 Try Postive Interrogation

Ever wonder how to transform mundane chitchat into captivating exchanges that leave a lasting impact?

Get ready to make the interrogation—-not the intense, police-style kind, but the engaging, curiosity-driven approach that turns dull dialogues into interesting exchanges.

Here’s how:

• Craft provocative queries: Skip the small talk and go straight into the juicy stuff. Ask about their wildest dreams, most thrilling adventures, or deepest passions. Get them talking about what truly sets their soul on fire. Instead of “How’s your day?”, ask “What’s the most exciting thing you’ve done recently?” Definitely check out these: 57 Killer Conversation Starters So You Can Start A Conversation With Anyone, Anytime
• Reveal, but don’t spill: Keep them on their toes by revealing just enough about yourself to provoke wonder and make them more interested. Drop intriguing hints and anecdotes, leaving them eager to know more. For example: “Ever been lost in a city maze? I stumbled upon an underground jazz club last week—a secret from another room….” Don’t be afraid of revealing something you might think is mundane. You can literally turn any event into something interesting: “Just yesterday I was cooking this mean spaghetti, but I ran out of tomato sauce and resorted to using ketchup packets instead! I was terrified of how it’d turn out.”
• Stir emotions: Stir the pot of emotions with questions that evoke laughter or empathy by exploring their highs and lows, their fears and triumphs, and watch as the conversation takes on a life of its own. Try “What’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to you?” or “When was the last time you felt truly inspired?”
• Probe with purpose: Challenge assumptions and explore new perspectives. Ask “What’s something you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet?” to spark thought-provoking discussions.
• Respect boundaries: Be mindful of sensitive topics and avoid prying into personal matters. If you sense discomfort or a topic seems off-limits, gracefully steer the conversation toward neutral ground, to ensure a pleasant exchange for all involved.

Step #9 Show, Don’t Just Tell

Why is storytelling such an important tool used by many interesting people? Because by doing this, you are not just conveying information, you are:

• rafting an experience
• painting vivid landscapes in the minds of your listeners
• stirring emotions that linger long after the tale is told

Some people aren’t drawn to mere facts; they crave stories.

And to become more interesting conversationalists, it’s important to recognize the types of stories or topics that can either dull or excite the interactions.

Here some stories (or topics) to tell and to avoid:

Interesting Stories/Topics to Discuss	Stories/Topics to Avoid
Unusual travel experiences or adventures	Mundane daily routine
Inspiring personal achievements	Complaints or gossips
Humorous anecdotes	Long-winded monologues
Mind-bending philosophical questions	Overly technical details
Heartwarming acts of kindness	Negative news stories
Cultural traditions or celebrations	Politics or religious debates
Creative projects or passionate hobbies	Office or workplace drama
Unusual talents or skills	Generic small talks
Unexpected acts of generosity	Financial problems

Action Step: Go through the table above and pick out 2-3 topics. Brainstorm ideas for each topic and pick your favorite, writing out stories to tell at your next convo! You’ve got this.

Step #10: Elevate Your Style Game

Ever wondered what makes captivating individuals stand out? I’m not just talking about charm here, I am talking about a unique fashion sense and personal flair.

Bold choices breed interesting and unforgettable looks.

Prepare to elevate your style game with these 5 tips, one daring choice at a time.

Now, let’s refine your style:

1. Decode your personal style

• Discover garments that resonate with your confidence and comfort.
• Explore a variety of styles, colors, and patterns to find your perfect fashion match.

Pro Tip: If you’re unsure about your style, start by creating a mood board with images of outfits that catch your eye. Notice any recurring themes or elements that you’re drawn to, whether it’s minimalism, bohemian, or classic elegance.

2. Invest wisely in quality (not necessarily expensive) pieces

• Focus on timeless pieces that promise longevity and versatility.
• Swap out fleeting fashion trends for enduring classics. For example, a meticulously crafted, tailored blazer that will elevate your style game for years on end.

3. Dare to Mix & Match:

• Get adventurous with your wardrobe by mixing textures, patterns, and styles to craft one-of-a-kind looks.
• Try pairing a floral blouse with a striped skirt for a playful yet refined vibe.
• Want to add depth? Layer a denim jacket over a dress or shirt for added dimension and style.

For more clothing tips, read this: 25 Best Clothing Hacks On The Internet (Tested!)

4. Curate thoughtful accessories:

• Add a dash of flair to your outfits with carefully chosen accessories that scream your style. Whether it’s bold statement pieces or classic watches (or bracelets), let your accessories do the talking and spin tales of your personality
• Transform a simple black shirt into a showstopper with bold earrings or a vibrant scarf.
• Wear a conversation starter – Charlie Chaplin had a bowler hat and a moustache, Elton John has his amazing suits. What could you wear as an interesting conversation starter?

5. Radiate confidence

• Rock your unique style with unshakable confidence, radiating charisma with every step.
• Stand tall, make eye contact, and carry yourself with assurance, regardless of what you’re wearing.

Watch as your personal style transforms into something captivating and dynamic, reflecting your essence and always evolving to be interesting.

Sept #11 Be Enthusiastic About The Absent

What else should you talk about when you’re tired of talking about yourself or the other person? What about our wonderful friends, absent or not?

I love to use this conversation trick when things get stale. For example, I met someone at a networking event who was into computers and coding. I’m not a huge coding expert, but I know friends who are! I brought up my friend, Chris, who loves developing websites and has worked with big companies like Motley Fool and Google. The tone of the conversation instantly shifted from me being uninterested in the conversation to both of us having interest—all because of my friend!

So here’s a run-down: let’s take charge of the conversation by:

• Highlighting friends’ achievements in conversations with authentic enthusiasm. What cool things are they doing or have done, even if you aren’t? 
• Bringing attention to their unique talents whenever relevant. What are they good at? And what is your convo partner interested in? Celebrate their talents and goodness!
• Publicly acknowledging their positive impact on your life. We all have people that have made a difference in our lives—even if it’s from waaaay back, like a school teacher.

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Now that you have explored these 11 effective steps to becoming more interesting, congrats!

Are you ready to level up your intrigue game?

Let’s dive into the key traits of captivating individuals. Get set to stand out and leave others utterly mesmerized!

10 Most Effective Traits of Interesting Individuals

Imagine being in a room buzzing with excitement, where every word spoken feels like a spark of curiosity and inspiration. In this lively setting, there’s no room for dull small talk or boring topics. 

Exploring what makes individuals interesting, let’s delve into the 10 traits of interesting individuals:

1. Curiosity: By delving into new experiences and knowledge from diverse sources, you not only feed your own curiosity but also enrich your conversations with depth and intrigue.
2. Passion: Pursuing your passions wholeheartedly allows you to share what truly sets your soul on fire to captivate those around you.
3. Authenticity: Showcasing your unique self, quirks, and imperfections sets you apart from the crowd, making you intriguing and relatable.
4. Storytelling: Filling your narratives with passion and creativity makes your stories compelling and memorable, leaving a lasting impression on those you interact with.
5. Empathy: Practicing active listening and offering support raises real connections and creates inclusive environments where everyone feels valued and understood.
6. Versatility: Embracing curiosity and digging new interests keeps conversations dynamic and engaging across a wide range of topics
7. Confidence: By celebrating your achievements, setting ambitious goals, and confronting challenges head-on, you radiate confidence, drawing attention and becoming a magnetic presence in any setting.
8. Humor: Finding and making a good humor in everyday situations adds charm and light-heartedness, keeping interactions enjoyable and memorable.
9. Open-mindedness: Engaging with different perspectives and daring to question your own beliefs sparks intellectual growth and enriches conversations with fresh insights and ideas.
10. Growth: By setting bold goals and actively seeking new experiences, you ensure a continuous journey of growth and captivate others with your ever-expanding horizons.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) on Becoming More Interesting

Key Takeaways on How to Be Interesting

Now that you’re armed with the secrets to becoming more interesting individuals, let’s extract the key takeaways that’ll have you waltzing through social scenes like a pro!

Here’s a quick rundown:

• Dive into adventures: Break out of your comfort zone and dive headfirst into thrilling escapades. Whether it’s trying exotic dishes or mastering quirky skills, keep life spicy with bold new experiences.
• Stoke curiosity flames: Keep conversations crackling with energy by asking mind-bending questions that unveil fascinating insights. Let your curiosity be the spice that flavors every chat.
• Broaden your mental horizon: Treat your mind to a dinner of knowledge, from ancient history to futuristic tech. Let the feast of learning fuel your intellect and keep your mind stimulated
• Spin spellbinding stories: Become the ultimate storyteller, weaving tales that transport listeners to far-off lands. Share your adventures with passion and flair, leaving them hungry for more.
• Embrace your unique flair: Embrace your quirks and passions, and let your unique personality shine like a disco ball. Be the glitter in the room that catches everyone’s eye.
• Spread cheer and support: Be a relentless cheerleader for those around you, celebrating their victories and lifting their spirits with boundless enthusiasm. Spread joy and positivity wherever you go, leaving a trail of smiles in your wake.
• Deep dive conversations: Skip the small talk and dive into the deep end of meaningful discussions that inspire reflection. Explore profound topics that don’t just spark curiosity, but leave them with “woah!”
• Banish boring conversations: Kick dull topics to the curb and keep the party pumping with lively discussions. Leave gossip and negativity at the door, and watch the fun unfold!

Always remember, the journey to becoming more interesting is an ongoing adventure. Let your curiosity guide you, and watch as your life becomes a story worth telling!

Even doing ONEone of the interesting things in this blog post will help you be more interesting.

Being interesting is about living a life that’s worth talking about.

Bottom Line: If you want to be interesting, put some work into it! Remember, laziness is the enemy of interesting.

You already are interesting! Now go show it!
For more interesting topics, check out this! 12 Amazing Tips to Stand Out (Professionally & Personally)