Learning how to be an everyday hero is an admirable skill.
But most people think heroes are born—but the truth is heroes CAN be created! Being a hero means being self-sacrificial and supporting others.
So how do YOU become a hero?
Ask This One Question
“If a Movie Was Made About Your Life, What Would it Be Called?”
Whatever point in your life you’re in, we tell ourselves stories.
- “I’m a hard-working manager trying to lead my team to success,”
- “I’m a single mom, thriving and strong,” or
- “I’m an experienced traveler always ready for new experiences.”
And in most stories you’ll read or experience, there are 4 crucial characters that keep popping up:
- Victim. This person feels helpless and doomed, and believes life can’t get any better.
- Villain. The villain aims to make others feel small. They often attack others, demoralize them, and manipulate them to their own advantage.
- Hero. They face the challenge and overcome them, transforming into a better version of themselves in the process.
- Guide. The guide is the person who has been a hero and now has the experience to help others succeed.
All 4 of these characters are the archetypes that we can find in ourselves. Sometimes we feel trapped as a victim, ostracized as a villain, challenged as a hero, and seek meaning to help others as a guide.
Victims and villains have a scarcity mindset, while heroes and guides have an abundance mindset.
Accept Agency Over Your Story
Do you feel like you’re always playing the victim or villain in your life? Perhaps it’s time to accept that you can control your story.
Ask yourself: “Am I the one who feels in control, or do I often blame my circumstances or something else in my environment?”
Research shows that people who believe their life and successes depend on external factors such as luck or other people tend to have more stress in their life and higher psychological and physical problems.
Action Steps: What questions do you want to ask in your story? What things do you need to make your story fulfilling?
Perhaps you’ve been working for years at a company without a single pay raise. Is it the company’s fault? Or perhaps it’s your own lack of effort or lack of courage to ask for a raise?
And if you feel like you need to move towards a goal or achieve something in life but haven’t, plan your bucket list or write down your goals and make sure you’re inching your way towards them. The more specific you can be, the more purpose your story will have.
Write Your Own Eulogy
Heroes need to always be reminded of their goals.
This is where a eulogy comes into play. Eulogies are typically only read at a person’s funeral, but writing your own eulogy and rereading it on a regular basis gives us a constant reminder of 2 things:
- Life is short. Sure, we might feel like we’ve lived a long time, but when we read our eulogies, we might find there is a big disconnect between who we are and who we want to become. Eulogies act as a reminder that we need to be constantly working towards our goals.
- Life is precious. While we chase our goals, we realize that we might neglect the people who are the closest to us. But we realize that these people are even more important than our goals, and building strong relationships with them should be the top priority.
You can even read your eulogy on a daily basis to get a stronger sense of what you’re working towards!
Action Step: Start writing your own eulogy. You can simply start by thinking, “What if…?”
- What if I quit my job?
- What if I have a family?
- What if I take more vacations?
- What if I spend more time reconnecting with friends?
Once that’s done, you can start by writing down your priorities in life. What’s important to you? Why do you want to accomplish them? From there, let the ideas flow onto paper. For more ideas on how to write your eulogy, you can check out this article or read Don’s book!
How to Become a Hero Takeaways
Being a hero doesn’t always mean saving others—but knowing how to save yourself first. Try these tips:
- Ask yourself what your life’s movie would be called. If you don’t like it, try to avoid playing the victim or villain.
- Accept that you’re in control of your life and not external factors like luck or relying on others.
- Write your own eulogy. Read it at least once a week to remind yourself of your priorities and meaning in life.
It might be hard at first, but there is always meaning if you can find it. For additional reading, check out our article: 10 Life-Changing Steps to Become the Best Version of Yourself
We are so honored to help you find authentic connections! If you are struggling to find the help you need, please note that all content found on this website is not to be considered professional medical advice. It is always best to consult a doctor with any questions or concerns in regards to your physical or mental health. For a good resource for therapists, you can check out Mental Health America’s helpful list.