Dr. Gary Chapman coined the term “love languages” to explain how we express and receive love. But the love languages aren’t just for romance! You can use the love languages to appreciate people in business, to support friends, and to show a partner you care. Take the Love Language quiz now to see which of the five love languages is yours!

Which one of these speaks to the way you feel cared for, or like to show you appreciate someone:

Quality Time

Quality time is about spending time together enjoying each other’s company.

People who need quality time crave alone time with their loved one, and want to catch up with them by having time alone where they can talk and bond.

You need alone time if you find yourself constantly desiring to be with someone, not just hearing from them or writing to them. You do not feel satisfied or happy unless you can be with the person or the people you love.

Physical Touch

Physical touch is showing love through hugging, cuddling, being intimate, or simply putting a caring hand on someone’s shoulder.

People who need physical touch want you to hug them, they want cuddle time, and always show “PDA” or public displays of affection to feel that you love them, and to demonstrate their love for those they care about.

You need physical touch if you feel lonely and lost when you have not been physically near a loved one. You constantly crave to be close to those you care about, and you demonstrate your love for them with hugs, massages, and even sitting close to each other.

Gifts

The love language of gifts does not require large or extravagantly expensive gifts. It can be notes, CDs, flowers, or leaving a pastry. These small gifts are tokens of love to the giver or receiver.

People who need gifts feel validated when you spend money and/or time picking something out for them. Often, the saying it’s the thought that counts really applies here.

You need gifts if you think or wait anxiously for holidays or birthdays to see what your loved ones might get you.

Gifts are usually a big test in relationships for people who speak the love language of gifts.

Acts of Service

Acts of service are acts of love when someone performs an action for the other.  This can be cleaning, cooking, driving, or even doing an errand. By doing that act of service, the other person feels love or shows love.

People who need acts of service sometimes will ask their loved ones for favors or errands, not because it is easier, but rather because they need the affirmation of the other person’s love.

You need acts of service if you feel unwanted or unimportant, if someone does not follow through on a promise, or if someone doesn’t do something you asked.

Words of Affirmation

Words of affirmation are verbal clues for others to express how much they love and care about someone.  Words of affirmation also can be compliments and reassurances that confirm inner love in an outer way.

People who need words of affirmation need to hear from the people they love frequently, and, to feel loved, they need to hear out loud what the other person is thinking.

You need words of affirmation if you find yourself constantly needing to hear from your loved one to get reassurance from them.  People who want words of affirmation might also fish for compliments because this is the way they feel most loved.

Typically, people have one main love language and one secondary one. It is important to know these so you can ask for what you need, and so you can show your partners, friends, and colleagues appreciation in the way they like to receive it.

About Vanessa Van Edwards

Vanessa Van Edwards is a national best selling author & founder at Science of People. Her groundbreaking book, Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People has been translated into more than 16 languages. As a recovering awkward person, Vanessa helps millions find their inner charisma. She regularly leads innovative corporate workshops and helps thousands of individual professionals in her online program People School. Vanessa works with entrepreneurs, growing businesses, and trillion dollar companies; and has been featured on CNN, BBC, CBS, Fast Company, Inc., Entrepreneur Magazine, USA Today, the Today Show and many more.

20 replies on “Take The Love Language Quiz and Find Your Love Language”

  1. Lo

    The answers never showed up – do I have to sign up for your list to receive them? It would be nice if that was made clear in the beginning….

  2. Sandra

    A question was thrown to me by a friend about this love language which he asked me to make a research n am so amazed n really love what i got here, at least i got to know my love language n love it, i also answered the quiz n am so impressed.

  3. Sandy

    I took the test and found the questions interesting. My son asked me if I knew my Love Language and I said I would do some research. He and his future wife had the course given to them before they married.

    What is my Love Language?

  4. Liam Hayes

    Quiet interesting. I’m very surprised by the receiving gifts category. It’s interesting that some people would like to receive gifts more than spending quality time with that person.

  5. Bella Perennis

    It’s good to know your and other peoples body language. People sometimes think I’m weird for inviting them for one on one time, but when I tell them that it’s because this is when I feel most connected they can understand. So knowing the concepts of love languages can not only make it easier to give other people what they need but to communicate and ask for what you need.

  6. Abby

    Thanks Vanessa for very valuable lessons. Somehow if we can just apply all of these points in our interpersonal relations, it will certainly enhance those relationships. We all need some of that at different times in our lives.

    1. Danielle McRae

      So very true, Abby. Simply being aware that we all have specific needs is the first step to connection success.

      Danielle | Science of People Team

  7. Robby Smith

    I highly recommend everybody to read Gary Chapman’s “5 Love Languages” book, whether you are married or single, anyone can learn how to identify & best express the love language of their friends, co-workers, dating partner or spouse. My primary language is Words of Affirmation, and secondary is Quality Time 🙂

  8. Kate

    I love this one. I’m going to share it with my family and see what they respond to the most. I can’t wait to apply this frequency towards my work and social relationships too. Thanks Vanessa!

    1. Danielle McRae

      Thank you for reading, Kate! What love language do you identify most with?

      Danielle | Science of People Team

  9. Fel

    So useful! And it’s always interesting how couples manage this, especially if their languages are different. I know I’ll get fed up about something, and then realize that’s just the man’s way of receiving love. Great video

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