Whether you’re looking for friends or something more, Tinder is one of the easiest ways to connect with like-minded people. 

A whopping 40% of people seek long-term relationships on online dating apps. Researchers at the University of Chicago even found that couples who meet online have marriages that last longer than offline relationships.  

But Tinder is far more than just swiping. Once you make a Tinder match, you’ve got to start the conversation.

These 160 opening lines and icebreaker ideas will capture their interest and get the conversation flowing.  

160 Best Tinder Conversation Starters and Tinder Openers 

People get many DMs they’ll never respond to, so standing out can be challenging. That first Tinder message can make or break an interaction. 

The most accessible place to start is simply asking a question or complimenting something about their profile photos or bio. Don’t forget to mention things that are unique or similar to your interests and experiences. 

  1. I’ve always wanted to meet someone who [activity listed on their profile]. How’d you get into that?

Are they dancers, writers, musicians, snowboarders, or fashion designers? This simple approach to finding out about their hobbies and passions makes them feel unique. 

  1. I have some time off coming up. If you were me, where would you go? The beach, mountains, or sleep in for a relaxing day?

It’s unlikely that anyone has ever DMed them a question like this. This is the perfect opener because it’s not too personal, but it also tells you about their personality. Maybe you’ll even get a future date idea. 

  1. So, when are we going out for coffee? Or do you prefer wine or beer? 

Why not cut to the chase and invite them out for a conversation, IRL? This line helps you discover their beverage interests and show you’re serious about scheduling a date. 

  1. Where would you want to be if you could blink and be anywhere in the world? 

People who love to travel should jump at the chance to answer this question. You can follow up with questions about their favorite past vacations and dream future destinations. 

  1. Hey, I’m _______. I love your photo of [something on their profile]. What was your favorite part of that experience? 

Sometimes a simple introduction is the easiest way to start a conversation. The formula is simple: Say your name, compliment something on their profile, and then ask a question about it. 

  1. How did you know I like _____? 

Blondes? Brunettes? Blue-eyed boys? Dog lovers? Ask them how they “knew” you were into them. It can be fun to flip the script and make it seem like your Tinder match is chasing you. This joking opener sets a flirty tone by embedding a compliment in a question.

  1. I love [their listed favorite food] too. Have you ever been to [local restaurant]?

Research also shows that people are more likely to connect over shared interests and experiences. So, it’s worth mentioning if you’re from the same place, went to the same college, or both like pizza.

  1. Has anyone ever told you that you look like [celebrity]?

Who doesn’t want to be told they look like someone famous? Use this opener to compliment their looks and move into movies, music, or pop culture topics. Just try to pick someone they will be flattered by!

  1. Quick question: how adventurous are you?

This opener cuts to the chase and gets to the point. It implies that you’re an adventurous person, and they might have a fun opportunity to hang out with you. It’s also an easy segway into a date or party invite. 

  1. What is your favorite song lyric that best describes you?

The music someone listens to says a lot about them. Stand out in their inbox by inspiring them to think about a song that fits their personality. 

  1. You seem fun—how is your week going?

There’s nothing wrong with keeping it simple. You can even add a flirty 😉 emoji after the fun compliment.

  1. What secret talent do you have that nobody knows about? 

A hidden talent can be flirty, weird, or downright goofy. Either way, you learn something about them and break the ice.

  1. Top three best things to do on a Saturday? 

Instead of asking how they spend their free time, ask about their top three favorite weekend activities. This will give you an idea of their interests and a peek into their schedule.  

  1. Small world, I also went to [their high school/university]. What did you study? 

If you went to the same school, you’d have a few things to relate to. Maybe it was your favorite study spot or a funny memory on campus. Ask them about their similar experience.

  1. Hey, you’re stunning. Have we met before? 

This classic flirty conversation starter works both on Tinder and in person. If you pretend you have met someone before, you can follow up with playful compliments about their appearance or questions about where they’re from. 

  1. What are your Sunday priorities? Yoga/gym, Netflix binge, or mimosa brunch? 

Giving a few options takes the pressure off of an open-ended question. You can gauge their interest in the conversation based on the length of their response. You may even want to invite them to a friendly group brunch. 

  1. I’m looking for a good movie tonight. What’s your favorite film of all time? 

Movies are classic ways to connect. If you’re a movie buff, you may even have a relevant line or meme to respond with. 

  1. What’s the weirdest thing you find attractive in somebody? 

Show your quirky side by exploring what strange things they might be attracted to. 

  1. So you’re a skier, huh? I just got back from Colorado. What’s your favorite mountain? 

Take notice of the backgrounds and hobbies in different profile photos. You may be able to pinpoint a familiar place you’ve visited or activity you’re both interested in.

  1. What’s something surprising about you that most people wouldn’t guess?

There’s more to people than meets the eye. This question makes your Tinder match feel unique and exciting. It shows that you’re not shallow or stuck on looks.

Flirty Tinder Conversation Starters

It is Tinder, after all. Here are some flirty message ideas that are slightly forward without being creepy. 

  1. Are you a country road? Because I’d like you to take me home. 
  2. You’re the most handsome/beautiful match I’ve ever made on this app. I would love to see you in person.
  3. So, where is the best place for our first date? 
  4. What’s your secret guilty pleasure? 
  5. Can we just skip the small talk and go straight to flirting? 
  6. I bet your laugh is just as vibrant as your smile. Can I hear it sometime? 
  7. If you respond to just one message today, let it be mine. 
  8. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
  9. I’m watching a rom-com RN, and the main character looks almost like you. Except not nearly as cute.
  10. In the mood for a fun evening? 
  11. I don’t even need a drink. You’re already intoxicating.
  12. There is no word in the dictionary to describe how good-looking you are.
  13. Can we cut to the chase? Here’s my number. I would love to hear from you. 
  14. I would love to take you to the movies, but they don’t allow snacks. 
  15. If you were a dessert, what would you be?
  16. Us matching = is already a better love story than The Notebook
  17. I Almost dropped my phone when I realized we matched. I just wanted to let you know you have that effect on me.
  18. OK, let’s share lousy date stories. You go first😜

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Good Tinder Conversation Starters

That first message can be pretty daunting. If you don’t want to use a boring “hey, how are you,” try asking a unique question or sharing a thoughtful compliment. 

  1. I find it fascinating that you [random fact they listed on their profile]… Tell me more about that.
  2. What’s your definition of a fantastic weekend? 
  3. What’s your favorite thing and least favorite thing about this town?
  4. Brunch or dinner? 
  5. Looking for recommendations: what’s your go-to song for when you’re cleaning the house?
  6. Waffles or pancakes? I’d love to make you breakfast. 
  7. If we went on a picnic, what snacks would you pack? 
  8. I love the color of your eyes. 
  9. What would it be if you could only eat one food for the rest of your life? 
  10. Hey stranger, want to stop being strangers? 
  11. What was the last song you listened to?
  12. What was the last book you read? 
  13. What would it be if you could have any superpower for a day?
  14. What would you do if you won the lottery tomorrow? 
  15. What’s the next place on your travel bucket list?
  16. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 
  17. If you had to choose: Dark chocolate, cheesecake, or ice cream sundae? 
  18. If you could only watch one TV show for the rest of your life, which would it be?
  19. What Spotify playlist do you have on repeat?
  20. What would you be most likely to get famous for? 
  21. Random question: do you have a good luck charm?
  22. Your holiday photo was so cute! What’s your favorite holiday to celebrate with your family?
  23. Do you believe in fate or chance?
  24. What’s your favorite movie quote?
  25. What’s the worst conversation starter you’ve ever gotten on this app?
  26. What are you craving today?
  27. I love your photos of you [doing yoga/working out/hiking]. How else do you like to relieve stress?
  28. Would you describe yourself as spontaneous?
  29. OK, don’t get mad, but I’ve never seen [movie/TV show mentioned in their profile]. Is it a must-watch? 
  30. Us matching is the best crossover since The Avengers, don’t you think?
  31. I’ve never seen a better bio than yours. What’s the most exciting thing about you? 
  32. Let’s get out of here. Shall we head to Snapchat or Instagram?
  33. I was hoping we would match 🙂 
  34. Your job sounds interesting. What’s it like being a [job title]?
  35. That photo of you [name one of their pictures] caught my eye immediately. Where did you take that? 
  36. I noticed you have pics in [location]. I went there last year. Did you visit [landmark or attraction]?
  37. You mentioned you love [musician/band]. I love them too. What’s your favorite song?
  38. I love your tattoos. What do they mean? 
  39. I see you’re a [sports team] fan. Was the town crazy when they won the [playoff game]? 
  40. So you’re obsessed with Food Network. How about a cook-off?
  41. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something about you seems interesting. 
  42. It made my day when I saw that we matched. 
  43. Would you rather spend the rest of your life living in an RV or a sailboat as your home? 
  44. Avocado toast or extra guac on your burrito? 
  45. Important question: tacos or pizza?
  46. If you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be and why? 
  47. Dream job: food critic or professional puppy photographer?
  48. Cat or dog person? 
  49. Are you a morning person or a night person? 
  50. Swiped right for the [detail in their photo]. 
  51. You seem like my type.
  52. You seem like someone who enjoys adventures. 
  53. Do you like to dance? I know a fantastic dance spot downtown. 
  54. What do you wish you knew more about?
  55. I love your style! Have you always dressed like that? 
  56. Do you consider yourself competitive?
  57. Would love your thoughts: what’s your favorite random trivia fact? 
  58. I’m super hungry right now. Any recipe or restaurant suggestions? 
  59. What’s something you want to do before you die?
  60. So, what are you passionate about? 

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Funny Tinder Conversation Starters

Sometimes a cheesy pickup line is all you need to break the ice. If you can make someone laugh, you might get the ticket to their heart. Laughter helps people bond more quickly. 

Pro Tip: Add an emoji to let them know you’re joking. Here are 45 Emojis You Should Know and Their (Hidden) Meanings

  1. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only 10, I see.
  2. We matched! Does that mean you’re coming to my place tonight, or should we meet first and ensure neither of us is a serial killer or living with our parents?
  3. WOOOOOO, someone calls the cops because it’s got to be illegal to look that good. 
  4. (If someone has a dog photo) Oh wow… those eyes and that fur. How long have you two been together? Is he/she jealous of newcomers? 
  1. How are you doing tonight? Have you dined with us before? Let me know if you have any questions about the menu, and I’d be glad to help. 
  2. They say patience is a virtue, but I couldn’t wait to message you. 
  3. Do you know how much a polar boy weighs? (Wait for their response) Just enough to break the ice. How are you doing? My name is _______. 
  4. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m feeling a connection. 
  5. Are you Google? Because I think I’ve found what I was searching for.
  6. I was waiting for you to message me, but I’ll take one for the team.
  7. Do you believe in love at first swipe?😜
  8. So do you come here often? 
  9. Can I skip the cheesy pick-up line and just say hello? I’m ______.
  10. On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight? 
  11. Water you up to later? Want to grab a drink?
  12. So, do you have any good pickup lines? I forgot mine. 
  13. I’m researching important dates in history. Do you want to be mine?
  14. I’d probably spend all nine lives on you if I were a cat.  

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Tinder Conversation Starters for Guys

After you optimized your Tinder profile for the most swipes and matches, try out one of these easy (or cheesy) conversation starters.

Pro Tip: Personalize your openers by using their name or referencing something specific on their profile. 

  1. How did you know I have a weakness for brunettes/blondes/blue-eyed girls/guys? 
  2. Your smile is so beautiful/handsome. What is the best way to bring it out?
  3. I noticed you noticing me, so I just wanted to let you know that I see you too. 
  4. You’re way too good-looking to be on Tinder. 
  5. You look so good. I want to plant you and grow a whole field of you.
  6. You are so attractive that I forgot my pick-up line.
  7. Do you have any plans this weekend? I was hoping to take a beautiful woman/handsome guy named ______ out for a drink.
  8. I’m not a photographer, but I could picture you and me together.
  9. Tell me, what would it take for me to impress you?
  10. Is your personality as intriguing as your eyes?
  11. Tinder is a luck and numbers game, so am I lucky enough to get your number?
  12. Favorite thing to do on a Friday night? Drinks and dancing? Cuddling and a movie? Or a sunset picnic in the park?
  13. That photo of you [reference specific photo] caught my eye. Did you get your [hair/eyes/smile] from your mom’s side or your dad’s?
  14. You’re crazy cute, but here’s the dealbreaker: do you put pineapple on your pizza? 
  15. What would a gentleman like me do without asking for your phone number?
  16. I’m honored you swiped right on me. You caught my eye, too 😉
  17. What’s a queen/king like you doing on an app for peasants? 
  18. Do you think we’re a match made in heaven? 
  19. I hope you know CPR because you took my breath away! 
  20. Wow, I never thought I would match someone as good-looking as you. 
  21. I’m a traditional gentleman. Do you fancy meeting for a beverage this evening?

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Fun Tinder Conversation Starters

If first impressions sound daunting, mix things up with some more playful openers and lighthearted jokes that show off your quirky sense of humor.

  1. Glad we matched… my thumb was getting tired. What are you up to today?
  2. Truth or dare?
  3. You sound busy. Any chance you’d add me to your to-do list? 
  4. I’m headed to Whole Foods; do you need anything?
  5. Would you rather date a 10 with a bad personality or a 6 with a fantastic personality?
  6. Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes? 
  7. Hey stranger, want not to be strangers anymore? 
  8. I suck at starting conversations. Do you want to try it?
  9. I’m not a scientist, but I can tell we’ve got some chemistry. 
  10. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at your profile, I smile. 
  11. Two truths and a lie? Go!
  12. Congratulations! You just matched with the _____ (nerdiest, funniest, most adventurous) guy/girl on Tinder. Your reward is a free drink at a bar of your choice. 
  13. Lazy Sunday vibes: getting lost in a museum, Netflix in bed, or cuddling with me? 
  14. Who would you be if you could be any movie or book character? 
  15. Send me your favorite GIF so I can get to know you better. 
  16. How would you describe yourself in 3 emojis? 
  17. I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
  18. Taking a poll: do you prefer savory or sweet?
  19. What’s one thing you couldn’t live without?
  20. So I’m just going straight to a personal question: What is the best advice you ever received? 
  21. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor? Ice cream date in our future?
  22. Random question: What mythical creature do you wish existed? 
  23. What’s your fav meme? 

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Key Takeaways: Start Tinder Conversations with Compliments, Questions, and Similarities

Standing out in a sea of online profiles is no simple task. The secrets to better conversations on Tinder and more connections IRL come down to classic conversational strategies:

  • Find common ground: Pay attention to things in their profile that you can relate to. Point out your similarities and find more ways to connect over shared interests. 
  • Ask about them: People love to talk about themselves. Find out more about your match by asking unique, thoughtful questions. 
  • Tease with jokes and emojis: A corny pickup line or a flirty winky face can help you stand out in someone’s inbox. 
  • Avoid Tinder mistakes: Going too deep or fast can be rushed or awkward. Commenting on someone’s body or saying something explicit can be creepy. Most dating experts agree that you should avoid these mistakes in your initial Tinder interactions.

If you’re looking for ways to win more friends or dates, you don’t want to miss these Tinder Tips: Scientific Strategies to Improve Your Success.

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